05 November 2012

0 PS90210: “well then, what’s the problem? your parents are out of town. neither of us have any diseases because we haven’t done it and i have protection so you won’t get pregnant.”

Dear world, heaven help us, we’ve arrived at “destiny rides again.” now, you’d think if there were gonna be an episode in season 3 wherein dylan goes to a pony farm and has hot sex with a horse breeder, that shit would be going down in an episode entitled “destiny rides again.” alas, no. much like chaste donna martin, we’re still holding out for that.

so here we are again in present-day 90210land. well, not exactly present but back in 1993, exactly 19 years and 1 day ago. (fyi- the near perfect timing of this pleases me GREATLY.)

and what problems will we be solving today? as per ushe, SO MANY. for starters, there’s the issue of sex before marriage. don’t worry, rosie o’donnell’s gonna fix that one right up. but then there’s the problem of those love affairs from last summer. what do you do when your summer fling shows up in blockbuster? what do you do when you’re accused of cheating on your SATs? what happens when the french girl you had a fling with winds up being american? what if you’re just not happy because you can’t be with the man you love because he’s with your BFF? what if your boyfriend really really really wants to have sex with you? what if you run into your priest in the adult video department?

ALL of these problems will be solved today, my friends. ya’ll ready for this? {continue reading}

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