there's a funny side-effect of keeping a blog for any length of time. it creates the false sense that your friends all know each other. like how you may have never met croftie or dougo or lindear or partner, but you know of them.
the flip side of this is that, for the people who don't know them, the people i don't write about seem not to exist.
so, when i say that my very dearest friends lindear and kj are coming to town, k.clen asks, who is this kj person you never talk about?
there's an explanation, beyond- though a part of- the fact that i am a notorious compartmentalizer of friendships.
kj gets me at my ugliest. that is why she does not show up here.
when i am so scared that i scare myself, i write to her.
this happens maybe once every five years at most, but when it does she is there. and though we don't see each other often, hardly ever talk on the phone and i seldom write about her, she is important. her friendship is fundamental. because we must all have someone we can go to. especially when we are too tired to be pretty.