thanks to a fortuitous conversation with a co-worker in the elevator some while ago, i recently came into ownership of a bread machine. a nearly new bread machine with a manual and all.
i dropped this bombshell into the deep end of the family forward gossip pool while skyping my parents the other day. this was for the best given that i would have otherwise been deprived of the stunning visual treat that was their total joy.
it was a joy that surpassed the joy they had expressed regarding my graduation from the university of chicago, my completion of jackie book 1.0, my receipt of the caroline kennedy letter and pretty much everything i have ever done aside from properly connecting the countertop dishwasher to the faucet after a month and a half of disappointing consultations amid the male and female connector parts in the home depot plumbing aisle.
WHAT?! they exclaimed in unison, upon hearing of my good fortune, leaning forward together as though one.
that's really going to change your quality of life, my father said, with not a hint of irony.
oh, cupcake, i'm so proud of you! my mother chimed in, as though appliance ownership were a goal towards which i had been actively striving and, at long last, blessedly arrived.
i knew it was only a matter of time before they would take action. before they would leap forth to ease my way into this new life of bread making. i knew this because they are my parents and i am their only.
and i wasn't wrong. five days later, the flours arrived.