31 July 2007

0 july: a revue

(in no particular order & uttered by various citizens of the Oline in the City world)


"for some reason, you really do remind me of mary boleyn. not in the 'bedding the king' way, but you have to serve two very different important people in a very careful manner."

"do you happen to be a work jacket with shoulder pads and thick material? because you are a BLAZER!!!"

"because i have nothing much else dramatic to ponder just now, i'm cultivating a dramatic ponderable just for kicks."

"you remember her? she just screamed professional skank."

"these things just fall out of my mouth and people look at me like 'are you gonna pick that up?'"

"when you break a plate, you could slit someone's throat worse than the terrorists did with those planes in 9/11."

"they had a really cool stage set-up but the music was just like a soundtrack to the lives of people who work at hot topic."

"when someone lets dear fly, i never forget."

"if your life gets boring without games, then you should invest in a dog."

"i had to go copy something on hot pink paper just to make myself feel better."

"i realize that has nothing to do with dead rats or anything, but i had to share."

"so he is in touch with his feminine side. so much in touch that he touches feminines."

"of all the days to entertain."

"he kept giving thumbs up to everything i said, but the kind where it is with both hands and completely out-stretched, following it with a wink of the eye, snap/crackle/pop of the hands, and a 'you are so great!' or something to that effect. it was the physical embodiment of the frustration in trying to understand a run-on sentence."

"i think our goal in life should be to surround ourselves with people around whom we can be OFF."

"his style says he might have substance, but after talking to you, it seems to only exist in 12oz bottles."

"you've had huge revelations today about the self-centeredness of a former boyfriend and your resolve to absolutely shun all non-jiving future behavior from men. my huge self-discovery was I like my hair, tee hee."

"what was he afraid of? being entangled with such hotness?"

"he looks like a cross between a vodka maker and kevin smith."

"then, there is X, whose profile just smells of alcohol. you dated that?!"

"these boys from your past look kinda like rejects from the russian gene pool."

"i guess the moral of this story would be russia is good for you, but only if it is far far away."

"with the posh spice reality tv show premiering on monday, i have quite a lot going on."

"well, what father is a fan of men in drag?"

"you see... that's one of those... empty... stories."

"the more i talk to people who are not my close friends, the more i realize they are not my close friends."

"for being all 'don't tell anyone about my horrible situation,' she sure has a lot of people in there to tell."

"i only have as many friends as i have fingers."

"stupid is so L.A."

"YES i understand that your daughter is sadly pregnant by a bad man. yes that is terrible."

"something stupid ALWAYS happens."

"people are thwarting me."

"you are quite the gift the literary world has been waiting for. i just wish someone would take a damn second to notice you."

"terrible things happen when you don't make a list."

"well at least we're not life-altering psycho."

"i'm QVing and she won't let me C."

"if you want to talk about bigoted people, you've got to go mormon or amish."

"remember those men we all kind of slept with?"

"i don't want to use you. well, i do but i don't want to call it that."

"let's... and this is my independent thinking... let's do something together!"

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