04 December 2012

0 november: a revue

"i will cross fingers for another opening in your cloisters!"

"ever since i put the makeup on at your house for the first time..."

"i don't want to see what i would look like as a standard secretary with shoulderpads, but AS.A.WOMAN. and then i thought, ohmygod, what if i did drag?"

"like, i would wear padded pantyhose."

"they are very on top of the gangnam style news!"

"it was both awesome and tragic in the way so many things in the late 90's/early 2000's were."

"pineapple head for the classy win!"

"oscar-winning is a self-prediction that seems to be spreading at an alarming rate among the untalented."

"i learned that halloween and leather/pleather/latex do not mix."

"oh honey. i know me some serena scott thomas."

"but you can make out with accents. i mean, people with accents. do this."

"her breasts are like the celebrity equivalent of a nativity scene."

"as for freemasonry, he'll be the grand-pooba at his lodge in 2016."

"what next? quit that biznatch of a job?"

"i imagine you leading a very bridget jones type life and falling in live with colin firth. hey, prince william is taken, hugh grant isn't aging well, so colin is my third choice."

"it was a lindsey lohan lifetime movie. It was better than the pregnancy pact, and I'd watch that one again, too."

"i mean, we all have our hopes and dreams of various levels, right?"
"that was absolutely the perfect response to my enthusiasm for a movie starring joey lawrence."

"you are 100% in control... of the events. not the emotions. those are ouch. i do not envy."

"a tough day all around for we eatons."

"with the option to 'whoop! nevermind!' at any point."

"i'm cartoonish. in a not-hot way."

"i wish pearl would give you a fur hat as a good bye present. i feel like you need a fur hat."
"oh honey, i already have two!"
"oh good. the universe makes sense."

"everything is an axe commercial with adrien brody."

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