5 this is a low

remember how my mum and i went to denmark? and how prior to going to denmark there was all this hubub about how once we were there we were going to have to wear these world famous t-shirts from this mississippi department store so we could have our photograph printed in the tupelo newspaper, thus making my grandparents burst with pride?

what you didn't hear was how, once we got to denmark and opened the bags, we discovered those world famous t-shirts were the ugliest things in the whole wide world. the shirts were so unflattering that we did not even wear them in denmark but, rather, stole away to sweden for a day to wear them there. the danes had been good to us. we did not want to befoul their lands with bad fashions.

so this is how my mother and i came to have our photograph taken by canadian tourists as we stood on the top of an overlook in sweden wearing world-famous neon blue extra-extra-large t-shirts from a department store in mississippi.

and it is that photograph, mercifully blurred and in black and white, that appeared on page 5A of the tupelo journal yesterday afternoon.