"i refuse to raise our children in a place where women aren't allowed to speak their minds, drive a car, or wear a tank top."
"you have this great skill at finding the best trash."
"it was the end of something much more domestic."
"let us thank our lucky stars he cannot become pregnant."
"it is only step one in my attempt to wean myself off people.com..."
"i am so tired of old men."
"this is huge! no, this isn't just huge... it is hooge!!"
"any movement is good movement."
"i will have killed 2 couches in 3 years. not a good tally."
"he put his hand down my pants and all i could say was 'no! i voted for mccain!'"
"i should have known it was going to be a long day when i worked for 4 hours then looked up and it was only 9 a.m."
"it is a man thing, so prompts and gentle reminders never hurt."
"i just focused on the pink and was swept away."
"seriously, you know he will come out someday. it is destiny."
"can i just say how much i LOVE that i got a reference to something because it involved exploding diarrhea."
"two jeffs is definitely a trend."
"i remember it as being fun- in a pregnant sort of way."
"the birth. you know... the baby coming out."
"i thought he would be, like, 21 so it would be ok, but no. i'm a pedophile."
"i'm cool with Jesus, but i really want the person who is running that site to go to hell."
"you're still douching as far as i'm concerned."
"next to engaging in consensual sex with another man wearing an ascot is the gayest thing one can do."
"well, it's more of a smoldering queeniness."
"it was because of her vagina that i couldn't hold your hand."