06 October 2007

0 rats & the city, pt. 2: TERROR!


this morning, walking through the alley by my building to the alley that leads to the alley that leads to the street, i saw The Most Grotesque Thing Ever.

there's been this smell in this alley for about a week. i'd blamed it on the ground beef container that had been festering on the ground. somehow the unlikelihood of such a putrid smell emanating from something as environmentally lethal and yet fragrantly benign as styrofoam did not occur to me. today, i realized the error of my thinking.

because today, at approximately 9 a.m., i saw that this stench was, in fact, emanating from the rat that was rotting in a corner a few feet from the styrofoam. but this wasn't just any old dead rat. this was the black dahlia of rats. his teeth bared in a macabre grin, his skull bashed in, his bloodied legs splayed apart, and his guts- long since gnawed open- a veritable dance party of writhing worms and mites. the rat who- in its violent disembowelment and oh so public lying-in-state- was, without a doubt, The Most Grotesque Thing Ever.

i've spent the entire day trying to forget this image to no avail. i took a nap and awoke in a peaceful state of bliss that was promptly punctured with visions of gutted rodents. i thought recounting it might be cathartic so i regaled S with the story. he laughed. no, no, i said. you don't get it. this is not funny. this is GROSS! my protestations did little to stop the laughter.

so i've realized here that the terrorists have it all wrong. screw china and the dixie chicks and airplanes. if they really wanted to psychologically scar this nation- strategically placed, eviscerated, worm-infested rats are the way to go.

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