23 January 2007

15 L (NF)


the bombshell and i are pillbox married. we have rings and have taken vows. we tested ourselves with the ladies home journal "is your marriage strong?" quiz and passed with flying colors. the other day, we celebrated our one year anniversary (observed).

and we have this philosophy. it first surfaced on her blog at some point late in the summer of our discontent, when she noted that "the world is not set up to support love," but rather that it fosters fear.

back then, we made a conscious decision. we gaily walked up orchard street with our fists raised, naively proclaiming our commitment. we were going to live in Love Not Fear. we didn't know it would be such a hell of a hard thing to pull off.

we've struggled with it in our jobs, our relationships, with our families, our friends and ourselves. we had to literally fight it out at a corner table in chipotle one rainy december night. and what we've realized is that ultimately, everything comes back to Love Not Fear.

because it's so much more comfortable to be afraid. to hold back and let the dear things drop. to live in Love, you must drop yourself. you can't see where you're going and all you can see are the horrid ways in which you might wind up bruised and beaten, so it's a hell of a hard thing to let go. and it's a hell of a hard thing not to turn back.

but if reading a bazillion biographies has taught me anything, it's that life is unpredictable but no matter what happens, in the end every little thing somehow- even if it is a completely implausible, seemingly random, rather crap somehow- falls together so we wind up where we're supposed to be. we so often fail to reflect on the life behind us enough in order to see that, but if you look it is there. the things that made you you. the schematic that brought you here.

i think this is the trick. in living in Love Not Fear, you have to have faith that it's going to turn out well. you have to have faith through the obstacles and the disasters and the inconveniences and you have to close your eyes and open the door and keep pitching yourself forward again and again regardless. let love and faithfulness never leave you, bind them around your neck, and embrace the mystery. no fear. Love.

15 comments:

Linda said...

Awesome.

i thought i was fostering fear the other day, but it turns out it was just gas.

Bombsy said...

wise, if untested, were we when we hit upon this, but i beleive it has been the testing and honoring of this maxim that has made all the difference in you, in me, in us. i honestly feel like this idea is my compass in life.
sometimes it takes a while to actually distinugish what is done from love and what is done from fear (hence that rainy evening at chipotle), but you hit it on the head when you said love will never, ever, EVER lead you wrong.

word up, girl. word up. L(NF).

Bombsy said...

i would also like to hereby nominate that picture as the official image of L(NF).

oline said...

lindear, i can only imagine that ever was the sufferer there. but better to foster gas than fear, i guess.

it's official, bombsylove. now we just need a soundtrack. L(NF).

Les Savy Ferd said...

that looks suspiciously like a math equation, dolls.

oline said...

why're you so gungho math these days, pirate? am beginning to wonder if you are secretly pulling out the trig texts after the croft is safely asleep and playing with triangles all night long. if you love math, pirate, let it out. no fear!

Les Savy Ferd said...

*hides protractor where nobody will find it*

Les Savy Ferd said...

i think the N ational F ootball L eague should adopt your "L(NF)" logo for an ad campaign. I can picture the NFL shield standing, shining brightly all tough-like to marching band trumpet fanfare then sentimental music plays and the letters rearrange, the curves in the outline of the shield shift into the parentheses (sp?) and two brawny strapping football guys come out and hug and laugh and everything fades to black.

image make-over!

Osutein said...

I think I now have a new philosophy, too. Thanks.

Bombsy said...

whoa whoa WHOA! Math has nothing to do with love! Math is a hateful, hateful thing! No math, no math! I'm affraid! AFRAAAAAAAIIIID!
*little feet running away*

oline said...

we should have L(NF) t-shirts made to go with our corduroy running shorts.

Linda said...

puffing on our glittery cigars.

oline said...

wearing your sashes, right? but of course you would. i can only imagine that you haven't even taken them off yet.

Linda said...

yes, we're still wearing them, but must say that they are starting to interfere with our daily routines. Showering is quite difficult with the sashes, and they do chafe something awful when they are wet. but we do feel mighty special in public. is nice to be noticed, you know?

oline said...

i do love how the mother cupcake didn't even flinch when i said, ok. tonight we're going to cut up this blue sequined tube dress that i just happen to have and sew these christmas bows to it and this spray of holly so it's the tackiest thing that ever was. only further evidence that the mother cupcake is completely awesome.