26 April 2006

6 "beautifull"

at crafting, the conversation turned to the recent influx of mass message daters- a friendster phenomenon to which myspace is seemingly impervious. i'm all for meeting people but surely this isn't the way. the breakdown of the educational system has clearly contributed to stunning shifts within courtship culture, as evidenced in the texts below.
wsup lookn beauitfull one question who do u
model for? if you dont mind mind me askn. I
just move here to chicago i m going to to NIU
in dekalb this fall for my masters. If your down with
it maybe we can get to know each other better.
talk to u

Was goin thru some profiles and came across ur
pic. Once i saw ur pic...i was like...I have to tell
this girl how beautifull she is. i dont know whether u got
this from any1 else or not, but i think u have nice
eyebrows. I know flattery doesnt get a
guy anywhere and I am not tryin to hit on
u or anythin nor that i have any intention to stalk u,
just thought it wuld be interestin to get to know u.

from these messages, six conclusions can be drawn:
  • the period is obsolete.
  • spelling is optional.
  • spelling like prince is preferred.
  • i am "beautifull."
  • writing a self-professed english-head using psychotically bad grammar is ironically hip.
  • friendster has out-sourced to asia, where the employees are whiling away the workday sending out crazy lame illiterate messages to american women in order to methodically destroy the image of the american male.


JJerm said...

this is why friendster and myspace scare me (and why i am only a newbie member of one). that said, women are more then welcome to leave messages extolling my "beautyy" anytime they wish.

oline said...

u r such a literate credit to ur sex prof j. am sure the "u r beatifull" messages will soon be pouring in!

JJerm said...

i'm all blushes now, caro, all blushes.

Clark "not so effen hardcore" Price said...

I got messaged on myspace...by a guy. He wanted to "meet up" with me. Now first off, my profile clearly states that my sexual orientation is straight. Secondly, how did this guy ever think that he was in my league even if I was gay. I guess he is just playing the numbers game or what not. Eventually somebody will say yes to his advances however hamfisted and unappealing they may be.

oline said...

maybe the creepy illiterate straight guys troll friendster and the creepy more literate gay guys troll myspace. aha! i've solve the mystery.

oline said...

and because i got all cocky and prideful- of course, i failed to properly conjugate a verb.